I’m going to warn you up front that this story may have more detail than you’d like to read.  But I hope my experience helps someone else who has a childbirth outside her hopes and plans.

I was due with Grant on April 18th and all my measurements were on target with that date.  I gained a whopping 50lbs with this pregnancy and a good percentage of that was in the last 6 weeks.  I lost my mucus plug at 35 weeks was 50% effaced and started to dialate a little.  I continued to experience long periods of contractions from that time forward that would eventually stop without helping to progress labor any.  At 41 weeks I was exhausted from being up at night with contractions, yet hadn’t dialted or effaced any more for all the work.  5 of  my 6  babies had been induced by AROM near 42 weeks, mainly because I have so much amniotic fluid that it prevents the contractions from putting pressure on the cervix.

The day before my 41st week appointment, I felt Grant move in a big way and then all the kicking was down low instead of high like the rest of my pregnancy.  I was afraid that he had turned breech and was upset with myself for not letting the midwife induce me earlier when he was positioned correctly.  But at my appointment she felt that he was head down and I didn’t worry as much.  I decided to schedule the induction for the next day.  Normally my inductions only require AROM (arificial rupture of membranes) which removes the pocket of water and allows my contractions to be effective.

This time my midwife wasn’t sure this would be enough.  She started talking about pitocin and cervidil, two drugs I’d never used before.  I was anxious about it, becuase I wanted a natural delivery.  I wasn’t confident I would be able to deliver without pain medication if they administered pitocin.

Darren took me to dinner at Smokehouse Bar-B-Q, the same restaurant he took me to the day I found out we were expecting Heidi, our first.  We went to the hospital from the restaurant to start cervidil to help the cervix ripen.  They offered me a sleeping pill since this process can start early labor which would keep me up all night, but I didn’t take it for fear that it would make the baby sleepy too.

I was up all night listening to the heart monitor for the baby.  Grant’s heartbeat seemed to be unusually slow and would slow even more during a contraction.  The nurses would run in and out during the night messing with the monitor to make sure it was reading correctly.  Finally they rolled me to my right side instead of the customary left and Grant’s heartbeat came closer to normal.  The cord and placenta were on the left side and when I lay that way it reduced his oxygen supply. 

During that long night, I tested the idea that I might not be bringing  a baby home with me.  My own blood pressure was taken every 15 minutes or so and hovered around 90/50 which is low even for me.  I was afraid to go to sleep, wondering if I would be able to wake up.

In the morning, they broke my water and instead of Grant’s head moving down into position, it floated up and away.  The midwife kept her fingers in place to prevent the cord from prolapsing down while the labor nurse pushed on my stomach to force Grant’s head down.  When they were satisfied, they got me up to walk around.  My contractions started coming stronger, but not strong enough and at several points I leaned against the wall to cry.  Something was wrong…I could feel it.

After an hour, they brought me back to the room for fetal monitoring and to check my progress.  When the labor nurse checked the cervix and for Grant’s head, she felt something else…a foot.  Grant had positioned himself sideways in the womb to make more room for his foot by his ear, which explains why all the kicking was down low.  This took the pressure off the cervix again and made the contractions ineffective.

We called for the elder’s from our church as described in James 5:14 to annoint with oil and pray for a healing.  Meanwhile the nurse tickled Grant’s foot on the inside while pressing on the outside to encourage him to pull his foot back.  This was most effectively done during a contraction which was very painful.   She suggested we try pitocin to make my contractions stronger which might make him uncomfortable enough to pull his foot back and straighten out in the womb. 

This was the beginning of my biggest fear.  Pitocin, leading to an epidural, leading to an ineffective labor and infant in distress, leading to a c-section.   But without trying all options, I was headed to a c-section any way.   I gave the okay to start the pitocin and the elder’s came to pray.  After they left, the nurse suggested I get on all fours and lay my head down on the bed.  She thought the change in gravity might inspire Grant to move.  This was a very uncomfortable way to labor, but after a few minutes I felt a huge movment in my womb. 

The nurse went to check my cervix again and when she inserted her fingers, he grabbed one of them with his fist.  He certainly had moved, just not in the way we had hoped.   I knew they would need to try manually adjusting his position again and the dread and fear of the pain made me wish for a c-section just to make it all end.

Then I thought about the epidural.  It would be better to have that in place already if we needed an emergency c-section.  Without it they would have to use a general anesthetic, admit me to the main portion of the hospital for recovery, Darren wouldn’t be allowed to join me for the surgery, and I would need to pump and dump my milk until the drugs were out of my system.  I started to ask questions about the epidural.  I found out that it doesn’t cross the placenta, it could cause my blood pressure to drop even lower (a concern that they would monitor closely), and that I would no longer be able to move about (a relief.)  I told her to request the anesthesiologist and then I cried.

I had to mourn the loss of the perfect labor I had dreamed about.  And relieve some of the stress of wondering if Grant and I would be okay.  It’s amazing what good a little cry can do to lift the spirits and bring on new resolve.  I knew God was with me and I tried not to think about the judgements of family who would not understand or approve of the medical choices I was making.

The epidural brought instant relief, both from pain and from anxiety. The nausea went away. I was able to think clearly and communicate with the medical staff.  I was instantly ready to face another labor and delivery if God chose to bless us with another child. 

I was nearly completely dialated at this point and Grant was still in a bad position.  The midwife decided to try one more thing.  She put on a long veterinary glove and reached her entire hand into my womb.  She was able with one hand to straighten out Grant’s arms and legs, pulling them back into position.  The labor nurse then pressed on the outside of my stomach to engage his head into the pelvis, hopefully locking him into place.  I couldn’t feel anything this time except for a little pressure.   It worked!  Grant’s heart rate improved, and they tucked me into bed for a nap.  I had been awake for nearly 30 hours by this time and had nothing to eat for a night and day.

After a little rest, Grant was born in just a few minutes.  Pushing was different with an epidural.  I had to concentrate to discern what was just pressure from Grant being so low and what was a true contraction.  When he was born, he was bluish purple and did not breathe without an oxygen mask and help from the nurses.   I did not feel strong enough to hold him, and was ready to give his care over to my husband and the nurses. After getting a good meal and nursing him for a few hours those feelings totally changed and I didn’t want to put him down.   I’m so thankful for the love of God that allowed me to endure the hard labor and that ultimately brought forth life.

I decided long ago that I cry so much during pregnancy because God is making my heart bigger.  I can’t explain to a mom of one how she will be able to love her second child (and her sixth) just as much as the first without reducing her love for the first at all.  I can only reassure her that it does happen.

I hope you will forgive my absense for the last week.  I had prepared my blog for a mid-April delivery and when I delivered so close to May, I was out of material.  I’m sure I could have found time to write something, but I didn’t want to.  I couldn’t tear myself away from this:

And even when he is in someone else’s arms, I can’t stop watching. She will be a beautiful mother, and is already so skilled with the babies.

And the youngest brother is learning how to care for babies too.  No jealousy yet…He has fallen in love too.  I’m sure the green moments will come, and I’m working up a plan to deal with it.  But for now, it’s lovely to see the brothers loving each other.

I’m all too aware how fast these baby days fly, and while I intend to pick up the pace here at the blog soon, I’m not in a hurry to do that.  This blog will keep, but baby Grant and the others will grow so fast.  I can’t miss a single moment!

I’m now a mother of 6, but still remember clearly the day my first baby was born.  I was young and scared and clueless.  All the books I had read couldn’t prepare me for the moment I became a mother and the unique challenges my daughter would present.  Contrary to one book I read, I found out I did have instincts–though I prefer to call it the Holy Spirit to guide me.  Here are some of the hardest learned lessons for me:

80% of women deliver between 40 and 41 weeks.  Only 10% of women deliver before their due date, and another 20% go the second week or are induced for being more than 2 weeks overdue.  It’s a great idea to add 1 week to the due date the doctor gives you and tell that date to anyone who asks when you are due.

Real Labor can be hard to predict, but most women get a “feeling” when it’s time.  I spend weeks and weeks in pre-labor contractions that may or may not dialate my cervix, but eventually stop before the baby is born.  Real labor will continue to progress with the contractions getting closer together and more intense as time passes.  Practice labor will eventually decline in frequency and intensity.  Real labor contractions can be several minutes long, but they may be short and intense instead.  Labor contractions can feel like menstural cramps, or bad gas, or even a backache.  If you do have back labor, this is a sign that your baby is turned posterior.  If you get on all fours and do pelvic rocks, this can encourage your baby to turn the correct way, relieve your back labor, and make for an easier delivery.

Practice labor and other signs (losing your plug, baby dropping, increase in cervical fluid, and pre-labor effacing and dialating) mean very little about when you will actually go into labor.  Even if you have none of these signs, labor may still start soon.  On the other hand many mamas have walked around for several weeks 4-5 centimeters dialated and 80% effaced.

There will come a point in your labor where the contractions come right on top of each other and you feel that you can’t do it any more.  This is called transition and means that you will be ready to push very soon.  Instead of giving up, take this point as a triumph that everything is just about over.  When pushing starts, your contractions will slow down and feel more manageable.  Many women feel more in control at this point.  Listen to your midwife or doctor very carefully during pushing.  They will guide you in how fast to push and how to work with your body’s natural contractions.  If you can stay in control and push the baby out slowly if possible, you may avoid tearing.  If your birth assistant is encouraging you to push quickly, there may be a medical reason why–it’s best to listen.

You can buy your pre-pregnancy size in maternity clothes only if you gain no more than 25-30 lbs during your pregnancy.  I usually gain 40 lbs (I can’t seem to help it) and have to go up a size.  Many non-maternity clothes will work for the full 40 weeks if the fabric is stretchy enough and the cut is right.  I love my yoga waist pants and skirt and wear them when pregnant or not.  They were the only things I could still wear the last 2 weeks before delivery.

Nursing is natural but it isn’t always easy.  Some babies have to be taught to nurse and it can take several days and require professional help to get it done. (Even if you hire help, nursing is less expensive than formula.)  Using an orthodontic pacifier can help break a newborn of tongue thrust. It’s best to try to nurse immediately after birth, if everyone’s health permits, because in a few hours baby will become very sleepy.  If your newborn is too sleepy to nurse after the initial feeding, it’s okay to let him sleep.  After the first 12 hours, it’s a good idea to try harder to wake baby up to eat.

Nursing correctly shouldn’t hurt over the long haul, but a new mama’s nipples can be extremely sore for 2 weeks after delivery whether she nurses correctly or not.  Using Lansinoh ointment on the nipples can help through this time, and using it for two weeks before delivery can help prevent the soreness.  You want to prepare the nipples by softening and moisturizing them, not by toughening them up.  Using a harsh towel to toughen nipples can make them even more sore once baby arrives.  If you are so sore that you are tempted to stop nursing, remember–it only lasts 2 weeks!

Most mothers do not automatically lose weight while breastfeeding.  Some even gain weight!  Nursing streses the body nutritionally even more than pregnancy does and a nursing mother’s apppetite can rival any teenage boy’s.  It’s still possible to lose weight while nursing, but you will have to be methodical about it.  Eliminate sweets and refined breads from your diet and choose whole grains, fruits, vegetables and lean proteins instead.  Count your proteins first, then add your vegetables next.  Fill in any remaining calories with unsweetened fruit and whole grains.  Drink a ton of water, exercise, and keep taking your prenatal vitamins. 

Babies cry for a reason.  They do not cry just to manipulate or cause parent’s grief.  Sometimes they cry to relieve stress (then it only lasts 5-10 minutes before they go to sleep.)  Sometimes they cry because they are hungry, wet, dirty, cold, hot, scared, tired, or have a hair wrapped around their toe or little finger.  Babies cry when they have gas, need to burp, or need to potty and would rather not do it in their diaper.  When babies cry hard, can’t stand to lay down on their backs, and spit up so hard it hit’s the wall behind you, they may have reflux and require special care.  Babies cry when they feel mama’s stress, and in those cases a next door neighbor dropping by to hold baby can make her stop, even though she’s a complete stranger.  Babies tend to cry more in the evening, about the time Daddy comes home or it’s time to eat supper.  Even the experts are stumped on why.  Pretty soon you will start to hear that Baby’s cries sound different and a certain cry means one thing, while another means another thing.  If your baby won’t stop crying and you can’t find the reason, call someone for help, or leave baby in her crib for a few minutes while you step away from the situation and get a grip.  Once you’ve regained your cool, It might help to strip baby down to her diaper and put her up right inside your shirt skin to skin and walk and bounce. 

After the second baby, labor pains can continue for 24-48 hours after delivery.  These are called after pains and many first time mamas never feel them.  After my second delivery, the unexpected pains were so bad I wondered if there was another baby there.  Even though I have natural deliveries, I’m sure to ask for tylenol as soon as the baby is here.  I’ve heard the pains subside for the 7th baby and on, but I don’t have personal experience with that yet. Anyone want to chime in that has 7 or more children?

If your baby cries constantly in the rear facing bucket carseat, it may be that there is insufficient padding in the bottom portion of the seat.  In seats priced up to $100, there is usually a 1/4 inch thick back pad and nothing on the seat.  $200 seats have very plush padding, which makes me think that it is safe to do so–but companies try to save money by not adding it. If you remove your cover, you can see what kind of padding is there or not there.  I was shocked at all the holes, poky things and hard plastic just under the thin carseat cover.  No wonder baby cries!  I purchased 1/4 inch high density foam from my local hobby store and finished padding the seat out, snipping the foam to allow the straps to go through.  It only took 5 minutes and the cover still fits great.

It’s best to rest as much as possible for the first week.  And good not to go out with baby for the first 2-4 weeks even if you feel great.  If you have visitors during those first two weeks, wear pajamas, try not to look too perky and don’t wait on them for drinks or food.  Accept offers of help and if you can afford it, hire someone to clean while you recover.  I once went to Wal-mart when my oldest was 5 days old.  I felt great while I was home, but had trouble walking through the store and started bleeding heavily.  Once I arrived back home, I had large blood clots and my recovery was held up for several days longer than necessary.  After my third baby I went to a special church service when she was a week old.  A well meaning person said, “Wow!  A tiny baby and already pregnant again!”  How RUDE.  I gave her a weird look and said, “Um, she’s a week old!”  I’ve learned to enjoy the quiet time at home while both baby and I recover.  Life will get busy enough soon enough.

It may be an exciting day when baby sleeps through the night the first time, but if you have been infertile since his birth due to breastfeeding, the overnight without nursing may cause your fertility to return.  It is possible to become pregnant right away without having a period to warn you.  Going all night without nursing may also cause your milk supply to dwindle, so be sure to watch for signs that baby is getting enough to eat.

That’s all I can remember right now.  What do you wish you had known?

Bag by Amy Butler

This list is for me, because I have a hard time remembering from baby to baby.  I’ve seen a lot of lists out there that try to think of everything, and most of it is a waste of space and requires multiple bags.  This is exactly what I use and nothing more.

Slipper Socks–For walking the hall to encourage early labor to progress.  The hospital will provide these for you if you don’t have any. I’d prefer to be barefoot, but hospitals frown on this.  I’ve started wearing the hospital socks during labor and saving my clean ones for after.  I tend to be very cold for awhile after giving birth.

Flocked Inflatable Bath Pillow (For labor in the whirl pool tub).

Small Battery Operated Fan (For labor–I tend to get really hot during a contraction and really cold in between.) Dh holds this for me when I signal him.

Snacks for Dad–This is when Darren gets all the treats I generally don’t buy, such as Nutter Butters, and chocolate dipped wafer bars. I also take zinc losenges to help keep him from getting sick with all the treats, lol.

Camera and Vado mini-video camera

List of people to call after the birth (prepaid long distance card if necessary)

2 nursing nightgowns (with nursing bras if they aren’t built in.)

5 pairs of old underpants (Actually, Depends style disposeable underwear are fantastic for this time.  The hospital often provides disposeable mesh panties but if your pads leak, the mesh allows it to get all over your nightgown and sheets.  Depends catch any leaks and keep your pretty nighty clean.  Just put your pad right in your Depends.  You can change the pad out and reuse the same pair of Depends until they get dirty.

Nursing cover–for nursing when visitors come

2 receiving blankets (for going home–I use the hospital’s while we are there.)

2 Infant gowns–the hospital will provide a t-shirt, receiving blankets, a crude cap, and small bag of diapers for your baby while you are there.  If you want something more for your baby to wear during the hospital stay, you must bring it.

1 going home outfit for baby

1 going home outfit for mom, including a nursing bra and underpants.  This doesn’t have to be fancy–no one will see you, since you should head home and go to bed.  It should be very comfortable and something that fit you when you were 30 weeks pregnant.

Nursing pads, nursing bras, and Lansinoh nipple cream.

Orthodontic pacifiers.  (My favorite is Mam.) I know the experts say not to use these within the first 2 weeks of delivery, but there is a time for them.  Many babies are born not knowing how to eat!  They have poor latches and tend to push everything out of their mouth with their tongue.  The first thing to try in this instance is holding an orthodontic pacifier in the newborn’s mouth until they accept it and learn to suck, then immediately trade the pacifier for the breast while the tongue is still rounded correctly.  It may have to be done several times before baby learns to eat, but he will learn.  If he is not learning as quickly as you thing he should, please ask the doctor to check your infant for a tied tongue.  This is a common problem which requires minor surgery to correct.  Please don’t leave the hospital until baby is nursing well and don’t be afraid to ask for the onstaff lactation consultant to come as often as you need her to.

Cosmetics and toiletries (such as toothbrush, shower gel, hair stuff etc.)  You will feel so much better if you can get up, clean up and fix up!

Belly Binder–For helping the uterus to contract and to start to repair your stretched out muscles.

Book to read, or other activity (Such as a soaker to knit–grin).  There is a TV there and you may have visitors to talk to.  Plus it’s important to sleep as much as you can.  But baby also sleeps a lot and you may want something to do to stave off boredom.

Milk Thistle Tea bags and stevia to sweeten–Drinking milk thistle tea will help your milk come in quickly and well, and help your body flush excess fluid retention, strengthen your liver and fat burning capabilities, and keep your bowls moving well.  Milk thistle tea tastes like paper and never gets very dark.  Stevia helps a lot.

Grant Milton Coffman was born April 27th at 4:30p.m.  He weighted 8 lbs. 13 oz. and was 20 3/4 inches long.  Mother and Baby are doing fine.

Here he is with Kimberly Negrete The Midwife who has delivered all of our Children.

And of course big brother Brandon is very excited to have a little brother.

Andrea, a long time Grocery Shrink reader, asked me to write a post about how to prepare for a baby frugally.  And since it is fresh in my mind, I thought it would be a great time to do it.  Here are the necessities for a new baby:  

Diapering:

18-24 cloth diapers. I prefer fitted diapers that require separate covers, but there are also all in ones, pocket diapers, and flat fold diapers.  

3-5 covers in each size.  My favorite covers are wool and I love wool covers that look like clothes to eliminate a layer.  I’ve really enjoyed the free Curly Purly Soaker Pattern for knitting.  And I purchased the wonder pantspattern.  I’m having trouble mastering the 2 at a time magic loop technique, but I’m sure it will come with time.  Youtube videos have been very helpful to me!  For little girls my favorite soaker pattern is from Tiny Birds Organics.  I can make a soaker with $3 of 100% wool yarn (That includes a 50% off coupon) or I can buy a handknit one for $10-$30.  An alternative to knitting or crocheting a soaker is to sew one out of a felted wool sweater.  Sweaters can be found at the thrift store on $1 day and any shorts or pants pattern designed for stretch knit fabric will work.  Just wash and dry your sweater a couple of times until it has shrunk, then cut it apart and use it like fabric.  When you are finished, lanolizeyour soaker and it’s ready to go.   

Curly Purly Wool Soaker by Marmalade Baby Creations

Tiny Birds Organics Soaker Pattern

24-36 cloth wipes.  Thin washcloths are fine or 9 inch flannel squares work well too.  I prefer to keep homemade wipe solution in a spray bottle and wet the wipes as I need them. 

Diaper Bag–This can be as simple as a large purse.  If you nurse you won’t need baby bottle pockets, but you might want a bottle pocket for mama’s water bottle.  The hospital always sends us home with a diaper bag full of coupons and free samples, and the last 3 babies the bags have been fairly stylish.  Before deciding on a diaper bag, think about your personal style.  This is usually an accessory for mom and should be in her style–not overly baby with pastel prints and cartoon characters. 

Clothes

3-5 infant gowns (My young babies pretty much live in gowns at home.  I can change their diapers quickly, and they love having their legs with skin to skin contact.)  

3-5 undershirts(With cloth diapers I prefer side-snap t-shirts to onesises.  It’s so much faster to change a diaper that way.)  A t-shirt and wool cover makes a great summer outfit.  The t-shirts only come in white as far as I’ve found, but they can be dyed and decorated.  I’m also working on a sewing pattern for long, sleeve and short sleeve side snap t’s that are a little longer than the ones that come from the store.  But don’t ask me when it will be ready!)  

3 sleep and play footed sleepers–these are necessary for when it’s time to put baby in a carseat.  Gowns just don’t work well for this.  

2 nice outfits for church and showing baby off  

Socks and booties are optional.  Footed clothing works better since most socks and booties are hard to keep on.  I’ve had decent luck with Old Navy brand socks, but they don’t come very small!  

Other Linens:

5 Receiving blankets.  My favorite blankets are homemade flannel squares. 36″ squares are perfect for newborns and 42″ squares are nice for older children. You can make them all 42 inches to avoid having 2 sets. For colder seasons, I like squares that are flannel on oneside and a cotton print on the other.  We stitch them right sides together and turn them out, top stitching around the edge.  Putting some quilting lines on them makes them like a light quilt, but it’s not necessary.  

12 Burp Cloths–I prefer the cheaper prefold diapers for burp cloths–the kind that Gerber makes.  They aren’t great for actually diapering, but make nice burp cloths!  Some mama’s like drool bibs, but I find they get twisted around, don’t seem to cover the spot that gets hit,  and cover up the cute outfits.  I prefer just to use a burp cloth even with my reflux babies–but each mama will have her own preference.  

Pouch Sling Pattern

1 Baby Carrier–There are so many options out there!  My favorite is the pouch style sling.  It has no hardware to dig into the shoulder, works from newborn to toddler, and is easy to breastfeed with.  Other options are the Moby, Ring Sling, Front pack carrier, and Back pack.  

1-Nursing Cover–This is optional too, but so easy to make that it’s worth it to have one.  My favorite kind has a boning piece in the neckline so you always have eye contact with your baby.  My favorite nursing cover doesn’t have D-rings (ouch!) or velcro (oh no, my stockings!), because I’ve found once I adjust it the first time, I never move it again.  It’s better to just make it to fit.  Here’s a tutorial. 

I don’t buy separate baby towels and wash cloths.  I had a hard time finding where to keep them and our regular towels work just fine (if not better.)  Baby bathrobes were also wasted on me, but they are so cute!!!  I prefer to get my baby diapered and bundled right away–it feels safer from potty leaks :).  

For Mama

12 Nursing Pads–Some mamas don’t leak, but that is the exception, not the rule. Mothers are more likely to leak with their first baby than with subsequent babies. My favorite pads are several layers of flannel serged in a circle.  Nothing fancy.  I’ve found the bigger ones show less under clothes.  Even if you don’t leak, nursing pads will prevent your nipples from showing through your clothing, and keep the oily breast ointments off your clothes. 

Sanitary products–the hospital provides a large package of sanitary products that are often sufficient for post delivery bleeding.  But if you have a home birth or extended period of bleeding you will want to have extras on hand.  There are lots of options for you in this area–cloth pads or disposeable pads are the best choices since silicone cups and tampons can be painful after delivery while your birthing area heals.  This is one time I’m tempted to go disposeable since the last thing I need the few days after baby comes is more laundry–and as helpful as my help is, they’d rather not deal with that kind of laundry either.   After the initial delivery bleeding stops, many breastfeeding women enjoy a break from their monthly bleeding until baby sleeps through the night for the first time.  This is one of the reasons I do not encourage my babies to sleep through the night before a year old. Once they do, my milk supply also drastically reduces. 

3 Nursing Nightgowns–My favorite nightgowns have built in breast support that hold nursing pads in place and eliminate the need for a sleep bra.  I designed a pattern that is perfect for this, and if you’d like to sew your own you can find it here. 

Daytime Nursing Clothes–these are optional.  I’ve found the most useful nursing clothes are dresses.  Most regular separates are nursing friendly and with the addition of a tummy cover or camisole, there’s no need to buy special clothing.  When looking for nursing friendly clothes, look for clothes that provide easy access to the breast (Pull up or down, or over from the side) without using buttons, zippers or snaps.  They will just slow you down and make for a frustrated mama and baby.  You will be most comfortable in clothes that don’t make you look pregnant still, but are friendly to your post partum figure.  Also, knit fabrics stretch around, are easier to maneuver, and drape nicely to eliminate excess bulk that can make you look bigger than you are. 

Belly Binder–I’ve never used one of these before, but have one on hand this time.  The belly binder helps to put pressure on the uterus to slow bleeding and hasten the recovery period.  It also encourages the separated bones and muscles to go back to where they belong after being loose and stretchy for so many months.  This can help heal a diastisis recti and get your waist back.  I got mine used for very little money.  Amazon has several available too.  Right now I have no opinion on which brand is the best.  Use your belly binder for at least 6 weeks (up to 6 months) or until you regain your original figure. 

Lansinoh–I am partial to this brand of purified lanolin.  When used daily the last 2 weeks of pregnancy it can help prevent sore nipples which are common for the first 2 weeks of nursing.  It is safe for baby, and can also be used to lanolize your wool diaper covers. 

Equipment

Carseat–This isn’t optional at all and can be the most expensive piece of equipment.  I like the bucket carseats instead of just starting out in a convertable seat.  It costs more over the long run, but when baby is asleep it’s so easy to carry him in the store without waking him. 

Infant tub–this is kind of optional, but I find it handy.  Some people advocate just getting in the big tub and holding baby, but I’ve found the infant tub uses a lot less water, and sometimes the other kids like to help with the bath–not so good when mama’s naked in the tub!)  Infant tubs are plentiful at garage sales for $1-$2.  

Stroller–This is optional to some people if they have a carrier.  I do prefer the carrier for crowded areas like an airport, and for uneven terrain, like when hiking in the woods.  But a stroller is pretty handy for family walks, shopping, and going to the zoo.  Sometimes I get tired carrying baby all the time, and a stroller has a basket for carrying our lunch.  

Bouncer or Swing–My babies are born with strong necks and can hold their heads up almost from birth.  Weaker babies shouldn’t use a bouncer until they have good neck muscles or the position can cause their airway to collapse and suffocate them.  I’ve found a cradle shaped bouncer to be a great place to nap baby nearby and keep him happy while I’m working with older children.  I could do without it, but I wouldn’t want to.  A bouncer is a necessity if your baby has reflux as it keeps him upright and helps stop the burning. 

Potty Bowl–This is used for pottying your newborn infant until he can sit up on his own.  It’s a new concept for many people, but I use mine several times a day and take it with me in my diaper bag.  I first discovered these with my 5th baby and was shocked how easy it was to learn his potty cues, save on diapering laundry, and potty train him as a young toddler.  To find out more information google Elimination Communication. 

Mesh Bed Rail–While my babies are still nursing round the clock (for about a year) they sleep with me.  A mesh bed rail, makes sure baby doesn’t fall out of bed.  I like to keep baby on the outside of the bed to help prevent suffocation or being rolled over on by my husband who sleeps more soundly than I do.  We have found co-sleeping to be the safest way to raise our new babies, but before making a decision on that, you should research the risk factors and know your own sleeping habits.  The benefits for me are more sleep,  longer break from fertility, and a strong milk supply. 

If you decide not to cosleep, you will need a crib and mattress with 3 crib sheets, puddle pads, and waterproof mattress pads.  If you’d like to make your own crib sheets, try these instructions.  Using 2 layers of wool interlock to make your waterproof mattress pad (sew it just like the fitted sheet) will elminate chemicals in the bedding, is fire resistant, and may block the outgassing of fire redardant chemicals in the crib mattress that are linked to sudden infant crib death when baby is placed on the tummy to sleep. 

Rocking Chair–It is worth it to sacrifice what you have to, to get a comfortable rocking chair.  Slip cover an ugly one, find it used at a garage sale or on craigslist or sell enough of your possessions to buy one new.  You will use one the entire life of your baby and with your grandchildren too. 

Place to store baby’s clothes.  Since we are starting to get cramped in our house, I got rid of enough of my own clothes to empty a drawer for baby.  This will work fine until he is ready to move into the room with his brother.  If you have a nursery, you may want to get a dresser for baby that he can grow with.